How my wife fights Huntington’s with the spirit of a warrior
The battle is ongoing, but the spirit isn't lost
My wife, Jill, has always been a fighter, no question about it. Before her Huntington’s disease diagnosis, she’d march into any battle against anyone or anything without hesitation, no matter the stakes. After she learned that she’d experience the same decline from Huntington’s as her father did, though, she seemed to lose some of that fight.
She accepts that she has Huntington’s, an action that’s both good and bad. Her willingness to seek treatment for the symptoms she was experiencing was good, but on some level, I feared she would give in to the depression and anxiety that made her feel like she’d never be herself again.
I’m sure she has those days, but she hasn’t let them stop her. Her fighting spirit isn’t gone; if anything, it’s stronger. The way she faces the disease daily feels to me like watching someone go into battle with an iron will.
The other night, after a particularly tough day mentally and physically, Jill told me that when she closes her eyes, she sometimes imagines herself on a battlefield. The image is vivid: She’s standing there strong, armed with resolve, drawing strength from the iconic scene in the movie “Braveheart” where William Wallace delivers his legendary speech.
In Jill’s mind, she is Wallace rallying her inner troops against an invisible but relentless enemy. She pictures herself charging into battle against Huntington’s with the same kind of fire as Wallace. It’s not denial, as she knows it’s not a fight she can necessarily win in the traditional sense. As she puts it, Huntington’s might be a part of her life, but it doesn’t define her spirit.
“Every day I might have Huntington’s, but Huntington’s has me to deal with, too,” she said. That’s the way she sees it — as a two-way street where she’s the first in line to wrestle this disease every morning.
Small, silent battle
There’s something both heartbreaking and inspiring in this warrior imagery she’s created for herself. On the one hand, I hate that she has to even think of her life in terms of battles and enemies. But I also know that Jill has always needed to know that she’s giving her all, even if it’s hard or painful. She’s the kind of person who’d go to work with an arm cut off and say she’s fine. That’s her way of taking the reins and making sure that she, not the disease, is leading.
But let’s be real: Living with Huntington’s disease is no cinematic war scene. It’s an endless series of small, silent battles. Some days, they’re skirmishes; other days, they’re full-blown wars. There are the obvious struggles with mobility and memory, and the subtler ones, like the invisible lines she draws to maintain her independence and sense of self.
This disease has forced us to redefine what fighting means and what victory looks like. For Jill, it means waking up each day ready to take it on, one way or another, knowing that she might lose ground here and there, but she’s not going down without a fight.
She inspires me, her husband and caregiver, because her strength spills over to me. I may not be on the front lines in the same way, but I’m here to lift her up when her sword gets heavy, to stand shoulder to shoulder when the day feels longer than most.
Jill reminds us that having Huntington’s may mean the fight is ongoing, but it doesn’t have to mean the spirit is lost. Her humor, resilience, and imagination are what keep her in the game. For her, the fight is never just about survival — it’s about facing each day on her own terms. It’s about knowing that, even in the face of something as relentlessly progressive as Huntington’s, she’ll be the first to step into battle.
And I’ll be there with her, every step of the way.
Note: Huntington’s Disease News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Huntington’s Disease News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Huntington’s disease.
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