I’ll always trust my wife’s intuition, regardless of how HD affects her

Two weeks before Valentine’s Day, my wife, Jill, approached me with an unexpected request: “Let’s go away for Presidents Day weekend.” When I hesitated, citing work deadlines, her expression changed. “I’m feeling bad juju about being home,” she admitted quietly, a statement that immediately concerned me given her ongoing battle with Huntington’s disease (HD).

Jill often worries that HD symptoms might lead her to experience delusions, causing her to doubt her own perceptions and instincts.

She once told me about how, in the cartoon series “Scooby-Doo,” Shaggy and Scooby were always dismissed by their crime-fighting teammates despite regularly sensing, seeing, or experiencing danger first. “No one ever believed what they shared,” Jill said. “But every week, they were ignored by the people who should’ve known better. Even if they’d been wrong, what harm would it have done? The thing is, they were never wrong.”

The parallel to her own situation wasn’t lost on me.

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I’ve always been a planner, preferring structure and predictability, while Jill, at times, likes to navigate life using her intuition. Over the years, I’ve come to value this quality in her, even when she can’t explain her feelings. So, when she mentioned “bad juju,” I didn’t dismiss it, despite my initial confusion.

“Bad juju?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

She shrugged, unable to articulate the feeling fully. “I just … I feel … I just need to get away from here.”

I saw the genuine distress in her eyes and knew that whatever she was feeling was real, and that I should heed it.

The next day, I booked a room at a fancy hotel in Virginia and planned a romantic weekend getaway. The trip proved to be exactly what we needed, allowing us to escape our daily routines and the ever-present shadow of HD. We explored the local mall, enjoyed amazing restaurants, and binge-watched reality TV in our room.

As we drove home on Presidents Day, we felt rested and content. But as we approached our neighborhood, our mood shifted. A massive oak tree had fallen across one of the roads leading to the street we live on and gotten tangled in electrical wires, reminding me of the tree that fell on my sister in the same neighborhood in 2019, causing her death.

After we arrived home, we noticed that our electricity was out. In fact, it was out in our entire subdivision. It was then we understood what Jill was recently feeling.

“I was so worried,” she said. “I thought the ‘bad juju’ was Huntington’s. I thought I was becoming irrational.”

Understanding washed over me. HD is always looming in our consciousness, the fear of its progression a constant worry. I squeezed her hand. “Oh, honey,” I said softly. “You weren’t being paranoid. You were being … intuitive.”

When Jill thanked me for following her instinct, she said she was grateful that I believed in her, even when she couldn’t believe in herself. I promised her that she’d always be the person I believe, just like Scooby-Doo and Shaggy should have been, and assured her that I’d trust her intuition, regardless of how her HD progressed.

In that moment, I saw a flash of sadness as she realized that her thoughts might one day become irrational and delusional. But I also knew that, no matter what she’s thinking or feeling, I’ll always have her back.

Note: Huntington’s Disease News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Huntington’s Disease News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Huntington’s disease.